Sunday, May 20, 2007

Part 3 - Dark Lords Have Feelings Too

When we last left the Dark Lord, woolen and stranded in the muggle world without a wand, he had found a sympathetic ear in the muggle woman whose house his spell had transported him to.
“So that's my whole sad story. The things you didn't get a chance to hear in those one-sided books.”

“You poor, poor man. I guess I didn't imagine that there could be a different side. I mean... you seemed like such a...”
“A villain? The bad guy? It's so easy for people to give someone that label. But it's so... so hard to prove them wrong.”

“But there's one thing you haven't gone into. That night. When you attacked the Potters. Why? Having talked to you I just can't even imagine you doing that. But you... you killed them.”

“There were circumstances. Very difficult circumstances. I went there as a favor to someone else. There was a question of... well... it's embarrassing, but I see that keeping this secret will only make things worse. I went there for Severus Snape. He and Lily... there had been an indiscretion on both their parts. And with Harry's dark hair... but when I tried to talk to Lily James flew into one of his rages. He was like a wild thing. We fought and things went too far.”

“But wait, what about the prophecy? And honestly, Lily and Snape? You can't expect me to believe...”
“You're talking to a wizard made of yarn, but you won't believe that a woman and a man could find themselves in a situation where things got out of hand?”

“Well... ok that's true. But you killed her! And tried to kill Harry!”

“A horrible accident. And don't you think I was punished? I'm still being punished. I'm made of wool for heaven's sake! But no one will let me make amends. No one will give me a chance to prove that I'm a good man. It's been that way from the beginning. A few odd occurrences at the orphanage and I'm the bad kid, the weird kid, the one who's a little off. And now these books. If you ask me... the woman writing these lies in the real villain. Corrupting children with one-sided views of good and evil.”

“You're right. You're so right.”

“But without my wand it doesn't matter. I'm stuck in this form. Trapped."

"And if you had your wand? What then?"

"To be honest... I've always fancied opening a flower shop."


Coming Soon: Part 4 - A New Man

4 comments:

knittingnurse said...

Have you sent a link to this to Rowling? I think she would laugh hysterically as well.

Gotta go now. Need to find dry clothing if you get what I mean. >wink<

Traceyleezle said...

OH dear, you slay me girl, you absolutely slay me. Keep it up.

Ann said...

A flower shop!
I just love it!

Miss Scarlett said...

That is so funny!
I love the last pic - my favourite.
:-D